just because...
Just because….
Just because you once sensed the sadness I carried deep within my bones, does not mean that you knew me.
Just because you glimpsed the vulnerability in my heart, does not mean you ever truly felt what I was made of at my core.
Just because you held me, does not mean that you knew what my Soul had been through.
Just because you briefly noticed my eyes change colors when memories of pain flushed my mind, does not mean that you knew what I was thinking.
Just because you heard the flutter in my voice when I softly whispered in your ear about the betrayal my heart had gone through, does not mean you knew my story.
You thought you did. We both did. But life plays us at times. We become blinded to the truth, thinking that we are authentic, that we are open, that we are connected…
But all along we were both protecting our bleeding hearts. And no true connection can be made when subtle details are being kept secrets in order not to expose the wounded child we all carry in our hearts.
I needed you. Needed you in order to breathe. Or so I thought. Not realizing that my need was not for you, but simply for someone to carry for me, what I wasn’t willing to carry for myself.
But no more. You see, beautiful one; now, now I belong to myself before I belong to any man. I have grown, oh how I have grown.
Mine has been a journey of facing my own vulnerability, of healing, of letting go in order to embrace what is coming.
So, beautiful one. The truth is; I no longer need you. But that doesn't mean I do not still want you. I do. Every moment of every day. But I now walk my own path. Carry my own wounds. I see who I am. And because I can now truly see, I can also finally show you all that I am, all that I have become.
And she is spectacular, beautiful one. I am spectacular.
Do you see me?
I see you.
One breath at a time.
I see you.
~p.barksdale
// by Bark.â„¢ // Walking Wilderâ„¢
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